How To Comfort An Elderly Relative
Having an elderly relative who relies on you for emotional support can be an overwhelming experience. Although, of course, you are happy to be there for them at this vulnerable stage in their lives, it can feel challenging to prioritize their emotions all the time.
Especially if this elderly relative is often confused or sensitive, it can feel as if you are walking on eggshells. It might be, on the other hand, that you get very little response from them at all, making it even harder to connect emotionally.
No matter your situation, we could all use a little help managing our emotions in this difficult world. Here is how to comfort an elderly relative in your life, while also taking care of yourself.
Set boundaries and discuss them with your elderly relative.
If your elderly relative has become highly demanding or you need help taking care of them, you need to express this clearly and honestly. Of course, you must be sensitive in the way you express these feelings, but ultimately you have to take care of yourself before you can help others.
Explain to your relative that you might need to share the load of their care with another person, in order to better take care of yourself. They are sure to understand if you do this in a rational, undramatic way. If they don’t, be persistent and patient. It can be difficult for elderly individuals to adapt to change, so try to remain calm as they process these emotions.
Try to remain impartial when your relative is making challenging decisions.
It is easy to get caught up in other people’s decisions, especially when they relate to a family member that you love. However, your elderly relative is still a fully functioning adult, despite their physical vulnerabilities at this stage in their life. They need to be allowed to make their own decisions, be it financial or emotional, unless they have extenuating circumstances such as dementia.
Indeed, remaining impartial is not just important for your wellbeing, but also for legal reasons too. You don’t want to be accused of undue influence when an elderly relative makes a decision, particularly one that benefits you. Read more about undue influence by clicking the link.
Be empathetic to their situation, and forgive them small indiscretions.
Becoming older, more vulnerable and less mobile can be a frightening experience. Often, we notice our elderly relatives become more irritable and snappy as they become older; this is often a nervous response to the feeling of being out of control in your own environment.
Try to forgive your elderly relative for this snappiness, and remain empathetic to their position. Comfort them as best you can, and let them know they’ll never be on their own, even as their circumstances begin to change.
Final thoughts…
Comforting an elderly relative and assisting them through a difficult transitionary period can be tough. By using this helpful guide, you will be able to take care of your own emotions while offering a helping hand to your elderly loved one.
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